More on Breastfeeding

I never thought I would have this much trouble. I heard about moms that had problems with breastfeeding and eventually just switched to formula. In my judgmental little mind, I thought that was the easy way out. Why give up? Keep at it and it'll work out. After all, breast is best!

But honestly, there's more to it than that. Let me share my breastfeeding woes, and why I will finally exclusively formula feed my baby.

At first, I thought it was my milk. Jaelyn was always super fussy. She cried a lot. I switched from milk to soy. Nothing changed. I finally cut out all dairy. Still no change. I thought that maybe she just wasn't a happy baby. Maybe I was blessed with the temperamental child.

A couple of weeks ago I hit my breaking point. Jaelyn was a screaming maniac. I didn't know what was wrong. I was beside myself. We were both crying and miserable. Phil promptly sent me and the baby to my  moms (you're NEVER too old to need your mom). In his words "I'm not trying to get rid of you. I just know that you need more help. You need your mom". Spot on, Kemp.

I went to my moms, and she also deduced that she sounded like she was crying out in pain. At my wits end, I finally agreed to try formula. Maybe it was my milk after all. I got the Sobee Soy for Sensitive Tummies, and she guzzled down 4 oz. 4 ounces!! I realized then that she wasn't getting enough breast milk. I only produce about 2 ounces every 3 hours. And come to think of it, at her last doctor's appointment, her percentile for weight had dropped. *light bulb*

After a few days of formula, I tried breast milk for a day. 4 ounce bottles this time. She did great. She's a whole new baby!

So, it was and wasn't my milk. She wasn't allergic to anything I was eating, she just wasn't getting enough of it. Low milk supply.

So why did I decide to switch to formula then?

Here is what I tried:
-Pumping ever 2-3 hours
-Drinking plenty of fluids
-Drinking a cup of Mother's Milk tea 4-6 times a day
-Taking fenugreek
-Taking marshmallow root

None of it worked to increase my supply. And honestly...it got to be too much. I became like a crazy person trying to increase my milk supply. Perhaps it was the stress of the whole situation that cause it to not increase? I don't know.

I have just been miserable with the whole thing. And that's not okay. I don't want my frustrations with breastfeeding to come across as frustrations with the baby or with Phil. Which it has.

So, I'm slowly weening myself. I still pump every once in awhile, and Jaelyn does still get some expressed breast milk. But soon...we will be on formula only.

It's a slow process for me to come to terms with this. But...I am coming to terms with this.