A Baby Story

It was a birth story I didn’t expect for a number of reasons. For one thing, we weren’t having our third child in a foreign country like we had originally planned. Circumstances had brought us back home early. Way early!

But there was a comfort in knowing that our baby would be born back home, where I knew what to expect, where I understood the procedures and what people were saying. There was security in knowing that our other two kids would be taken care of by family.

And it was this comfort and security that I would need as our baby was born and then quickly taken to the NICU.

It was a very different labor and delivery than I had experienced with my first two kids. For one thing, I went into labor on my own. No induction needed this time. It was also the fastest labor and delivery. What I didn’t realize at the time was that the baby came down the birth canal so fast that she aspirated amniotic fluid into her lungs.

“It’s a girl!” I heard my husband excitedly proclaim. A girl! Another little girl. Oh my goodness…the joy overwhelmed me and the tears started flowing.

“Eliza. Her name is Eliza” I whispered.

I turned to see her with the nursing staff. The nurses had informed me that they give the baby to the mom immediately after delivery, but I still wasn’t holding my new baby. Why wasn’t I holding her yet?

After delivering a baby you anticipate hearing that first cry. You hold your breath and eagerly await that newborn wailing, which indicates her lungs have expanded and she can breathe! It’s such a miracle, it’s such an amazing moment.

But the seconds went by and I didn’t hear her.

You never want to assume the worst, but really you just can’t help it. Why isn’t she crying?!

The words wouldn’t come out of my mouth, but apparently the nurse could see the look of panic on my face. “This is normal. She’s doing just fine” she said to me.

And then the nurse caring for the baby let us know that she just wasn’t able to breath very well on her own and the little cannula that they had for her wasn’t enough. She needed to go to the NICU.

It all happened so fast. It was shocking. I didn’t even know what time she was born, how long she was or how much she weighed. All I knew was that she was very very blue, and she wasn’t in my arms.

I was scared.

No mother ever expects her baby to go to the NICU. I had drastically different expectations for our stay in the hospital. Little miss would room in with me. I would get some quality bonding time with her before going back home to the craziness of having two toddlers. Just mommy and baby for 2 days. I knew I would miss my tots, but I was excited to have this time away.

Suddenly though, it was nothing like I thought it would be. Our little girl was on a cpap to help her breathe, she had an umbilical line and was receiving antibiotics and fluids, and she had a nasogastric tube in her nose. She just had so many things connected to her and she seemed even smaller and more fragile than a newborn typically does.  It was weird to have just delivered a baby, but not be able told her when I wanted to, not to be able to feed her, to receive updates about her from the nurses and doctors.

I don’t know what would have happened if we were still in France when Eliza was born. I don’t know what the hospital there was like, how the doctors and nurses would have responded, what the NICU there was like. What I do know though is that I was so grateful to be back home where I was comfortable, where I understood what the medical staff were saying, where I knew my other two kids were being taken care of by family. There was security in being home. And I was grateful that, for whatever the reason, God had brought us home when He did.

And after only 3 days in the NICU, Eliza was well enough to go home. It was such a joy to be able to bring her home and have all three of my kids in the same place! I thank God for my little miracle baby and for her quick recovery.

Eliza Grace, born January 28^th at 10:43 a.m. 

She was 7lbs 6 oz, 20 inches long, and my 3^rd miracle baby!